Sessions & Therapeutic Space
I offer both in-person and on-line sessions. We can discuss your needs and what is right for you during our initial telephone conversation. I offer short and long-term therapy, but the length of therapy will depend on the difficulties that you are facing and how long you wish to stay working with me.
In-person sessions are held at a private venue which offers a peaceful, natural, and welcoming environment. My therapy room is light and spacious and enjoys views of the surrounding semi-rural space which there is also opportunity to work in.
Our Therapeutic Relationship
My aim is to offer you a reflective, collaborative & reparative space with which to explore your problems.
I regard our therapeutic relationship as very important and central to our work together. It is very different to the type of one you will experience with friends, family & colleagues. It is secure, confidential & contained and the focus is on your experience of your problems. I will not give you advice, nor will I judge you or tell you what to do, but instead I will accept all your experiences & feelings as valid and work with you to make sense of them. Together we will work through what you feel is best for you and in doing so you may start to manage your life more affectively.
My Therapeutic Approach
I draw on different therapeutic approaches to work with clients, but I am particularly informed by Attachment Theory as a way of approaching clients past and current challenges.
Attachment Based Approach
Our attachments in life (with family, friends, community, and the wider world) shape our individual growth and emotional development. In particular, I recognise that early life bonds & experiences, relationships, and the environment that we grow up in define & influence who we are and our current difficulties.
When we have secure attachment experiences that are consistent, loving, predictable and attuned, we develop emotional security in our self and in the world at large. When our attachment experiences are less than secure, perhaps when they have been inconsistent, abusive, traumatic, or neglectful, we might struggle to have a secure sense of ourself and feel unable to cope with life.
Overtime, by developing a secure and trusting attachment with me, I hope that our relationship becomes a container for curiosity and exploration; to help make sense of, process and come to terms with your difficult feelings and experiences. The hope is that our relationship will provide a space for developing a more secure sense of yourself and a catalyst for change.
I also appreciate how emotional responses to situations affect us physically. These somatic symptoms can often be overlooked or go unrecognised; however, they are important in helping us to recognise why and how we react to certain situations in the here and now, and how they can link to much earlier experiences. Being able to better calm your body can also help to calm your mind. So, I pay attention to both emotional and physical responses to enable the body and the mind to work closer together.
Taking these approaches helps to uncover the less conscious reasons why and how you may relate to people or why you feel stuck in your present problems. It can allow old patterns to change and assist in the better management of your thoughts, feelings and responses. Importantly, it encourages change at a much deeper & meaningful level and in a long-lasting way.
As you start to accept yourself, you can re-connect with your strengths & start to feel more empowered.
My aim is to support you in gaining the confidence and capacity to better support yourself.
Self-Help Reading
Self-help reading can be a great way to support you as well as assist the process of therapy, but this doesn’t have to be through reading ‘self-help’ books. Clients often ask for suggestions, although in my experience how much a book helps is very much down to the individual experience of the book and their connection with it. Sometimes insights about ourselves are gained simply through the sharing of other people’s stories.
There is a wealth of self-help books written on many different topics, which come with all sorts of different approaches and angles. If you would like a more specific recommendation, we can discuss what sort of book might best connect with you.
Listed below are some of the books I have recommended – not all are ‘self-help’, but they may be helpful.
And there are also images of my own reading on this page too.
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma
by Bessel van der Kolk
Why Love Matters by Sue Gerhardt
The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
Mating In Captivity by Esther Perel
The State of Affairs by Esther Perel
The Choice by Edith Eger
